just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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