idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
