I want to make a zoo with you.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
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i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
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The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...