Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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