i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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