I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
