Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
