I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
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She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
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well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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