Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
