She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize