you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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