Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize