I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
