She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize