I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
