I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Randomize
