my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
