I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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