Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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