you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
