I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Randomize
