Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(678): View more from Georgia

did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband

(404): View more from Georgia

did it work?

(678): View more from Georgia

nope

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(678): did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband (404): did it work? (678): nope http://tfl.nu/53k6

Replies (44) Good night (734) Bad night (2114)
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(917): View more from New York City

i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.

(516): View more from New York

was the water running?

(917): View more from New York City

yeah but he said he knows how to swim

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(917): i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower. (516): was the water running? (917): yeah but he said he knows how to swim http://tfl.nu/akph

Replies (10) Good night (6418) Bad night (1247)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.

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(908): Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time. http://tfl.nu/kf31

Replies (11) Good night (953) Bad night (4410)
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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.

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(832): I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY. http://tfl.nu/qe8v

Replies (24) Good night (4596) Bad night (2092)
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(518): View more from New York

I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!

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(518): I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!! http://tfl.nu/03oq

Replies (21) Good night (4724) Bad night (903)
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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning

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(780): downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning http://tfl.nu/3yhr

Replies (5) Good night (3385) Bad night (1068)
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(519): View more from Ontario

you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..

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(519): you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism.. http://tfl.nu/640h

Replies (2) Good night (2394) Bad night (1124)
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(913): View more from Kansas

I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.

(1-913): View more from Kansas

So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.

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(913): I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms. (1-913): So you know, I'm making that my facebook status. http://tfl.nu/4s8l

Replies (24) Good night (7917) Bad night (1328)
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(319): View more from Iowa

I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.

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(319): I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming. http://tfl.nu/9kx6

Replies (1) Good night (811) Bad night (985)
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(704): View more from North Carolina

Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell

(1-704): View more from North Carolina

Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those

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(704): Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell (1-704): Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those http://tfl.nu/iyze

Replies (4) Good night (1744) Bad night (942)
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(813): View more from Florida

Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina

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(813): Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina http://tfl.nu/thir

Replies (9) Good night (2660) Bad night (772)
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(226): View more from Ontario

This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.

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(226): This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible. http://tfl.nu/a5mz

Replies (6) Good night (2933) Bad night (629)
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(720): View more from Colorado

We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.

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(720): We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that. http://tfl.nu/jp9a

Replies (5) Good night (1163) Bad night (470)
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(937): View more from Ohio

so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.

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(937): so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency. http://tfl.nu/1ixd

Replies (3) Good night (2010) Bad night (546)
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(+64): View more from New Zealand

Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.

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(+64): Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed. http://tfl.nu/dscf

Replies (0) Good night (622) Bad night (305)

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