Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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