I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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