He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
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