You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
