Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
