dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
