I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
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