Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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