hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
This is my gift to your gina
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize