a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
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