I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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