speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
So. Much. Porn.
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