so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
