I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
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