new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Randomize
