I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
