I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
