My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize