Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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