I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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