I want to walk on stilts...naked
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize
