Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
