if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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