so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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