You're so nebulous sometimes
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
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