Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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