ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
God I need to hump something, right now.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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