There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
My feet surprised me
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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