One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
