i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Randomize
